It’s a F**cking Quarantine!

There’s been a bunch of emails circulating about sharing poems or other inspirational sayings to get us through this pandemic.  And, while I have not had any inclination to write something more intellectual, I did get inspired to write a poem!  So, for your Saturday reading pleasure, I offer the following:

It’s a F***cking Quarantine
By Andrea Kupfer Schneider (on the occasion of the Coronavirus)
(and with a hat tip to Go the F*c k to Sleep for inspiration)

A global pandemic
Only in the movies have we seen
Need to stay home to stay healthy
It’s a f**cking quarantine

Fresh air might be nice
And the grass is finally green,
Too bad, stay (mostly) inside
It’s a f**cking quarantine

School is still on, get it together,
Just ask your dean
But teach your class from home
It’s a f**cking quarantine

You’re tired of cooking so soon?
And the leftovers are green?
There must be something in the freezer
It’s a f**cking quarantine

No makeup, no jewels
There’s no need to preen
Hang all day in yoga pants
It’s a f**cking quarantine

See your (mini) friends & family
All through the screen
Get used to blue light glasses
It’s a f**cking quarantine

From empty nest to full house
There’s way too much to clean
Just enjoy the company
It’s a f**cking quarantine

The kids are bored already
To each other, kind of mean
Each find a couch to relax
It’s a f**cking quarantine

Partiers on the beach
Must think they have a magic gene
But they are not immune
It’s a f**cking quarantine

Politicians who are not helpful
Sounding dumber than a teen
Could you perhaps set an example?
It’s a f**cking quarantine

But I know this too shall pass
And with it, this happy family scene
So enjoy the time together
It’s a f**cking quarantine!

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